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For too long, prominent figures have given advice stating that “a balanced life” is what you should strive for. Achieving a good “work-life” balance or simply just achieving balance in your day to day routine should be your goal. Well, unfortunately, that just isn’t attainable. It’s time for you to stop pursuing a balanced life and start making choices that align with your goals.
Achieving balance implies that in all elements of your life, there is the same amount of everything. This just isn’t possible. At times, your kids will consume the majority of your time and will be the main focal point of everything you do. Would it be accurate to say you have an imbalanced life because you focus so much of your time and energy on your kids? Rather than looking to achieve balance, we need to begin weighing things differently.
Having a weighted life implies that you have made a decision that is the best use of your time. Whether this is you focusing on your job, your dreams, your kids, a home renovation, the choices we make in our lives make us whole. Making a decision that affects one element of your life more than another does not make you an unbalanced person, you’re just weighted differently.
Everyone weighs elements of their life differently. As we grow older and our lives change, the weight we attribute to different elements changes. It’s important to recognize that balance makes us vanilla rather than being the whole sundae.
The self-help industry will never stop growing as people will always want to improve their life differently than someone else. The reason there are so many different types of coaches – life coach, mentor, business coach – is because they focus on the individuals’ weaknesses rather than their strengths. It’s easier to improve in areas that are weak rather than strengthening our strengths.
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If we’re always striving to improve our weaknesses, our strengths will weaken and the cycle will never end.
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One of the best improvement strategies you can adopt is to double down on your most powerful strengths. Make your strengths even stronger to achieve greatness, not balance.
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Four steps to improve yourself:
- If you say you’re going to do it. DO IT!
- Manage your coworkers. Don’t let them manage and mold you.
- Be proactive about your life and the activities surrounding you.
- Be positive to the point where you’re almost a “yes man/woman”
We need to be more like farmers rather than home gardeners. Rather than trying to grow a ton of crops at home hoping we can have a bountiful harvest, focus on growing a few select crops really, really, really well.
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The same goes for the people in our lives. If we can focus on the strengths of the people in our lives, we can help them grow from good to great rather than from bad to mediocre
There is no one in the world who is balanced. If they say they are, they’re a liar. We are all lopsided, whether we’ll admit it or not. There is no one that is great at everything. There is no one who is good at everything. Everyone has their own strengths and it’s important to recognize that. Our society doesn’t reward balance and diversification, it only rewards concentration in areas of strength.
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Concentrating on our strengths will yield the greatest reward, every single time.
Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert, created and implemented what he calls a “skill stack.” This is when you take two or three of your complementary skills and get so good at them that you’ll be in the top 25% of the world at them.
Scott worked on his graphic design and comic skills to become part of the world’s top 25% which led to Dilbert becoming an international hit. To win large you need to focus small.
We need to stop seeking balance and focus on weighing what’s truly important to us. Understand that as you work on your strengths, other elements of your life will diminish. You need to be deliberate about the choices you make. If you want to be a great parent, your personal friendships could suffer. If you want to become a great writer, your social life will diminish. Be deliberate about the trade-offs you’re willing to make.
You cannot be great at everything, and you should never try to be. Change your mindset from trying to achieve balance to avoiding it at all costs.
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